become a farmer in seven days

springtank2Here is our recipe.  Enrollment requirements:  beg, steal or borrow a couple of acres of waste land:

  • Day one
    • Buy or beg a goat, 50 ft. of airline cable, 2 swivels, a cinder block, and a bucket
      • Tether the goat in your worst briars and scrub; give her a bucket of water
      • Milk her, drink the milk
    • Cost: $100 or the sky’s the limit, depending on the goat
  • Day two,
    • Build a 4′ x 8’compost bin, put a dog carrier at one end, and install six pullets
    • Fill the other end of the bin with at least twelve inches of organic matter: wood chips, grass clippings, leaves, sawdust, even shredded paper
    • Add all your kitchen and table scraps, and let the chickens go at it.
    • Milk the goat, move her tether
    • Cost: $50 for the chickens, $30 for a roll of woven wire, scrounge the posts and dog carrier
  • Day three
    • Use a garden fork and shovel to dig a 4 x 8 garden bed
    • Plant four tomato plants, two squash, a row of bean plants, six feet of lettuce, and three of your favorite herbs. Mulch between the rows
    • Milk the goat, move her tether
    • Have a beer and a good stretch
    • Cost: < $10 for seeds and seedlings
  • Day four
    •  Put a barrel under your gutter spout. Better yet, an IBC
    • Layer wet cardboard and grass clippings in three places you plan to put a future garden
    • Build more compost piles. Scrounge organic matter wherever you can:
      • Tree trimmers
      • Alley ways and neighbors
      • Rake your own leaves
      • Shredded paper
      • Collect from local sources
    • Milk the goat, move her tether
    • Throw food scraps to the chickens, collect eggs
    • Go sit in the shade and draw maps of your land; sketch in where you imagine future improvements should be: fruit trees, possibly a shed, gardens, etc.
    • Cost: scrounging a barrel or IBC
  • Day five
    • Use whatever goat milk you haven’t drunk in the past three days to make a feta or mozz
    • Make omelets for dinner
    • Milk the goat, move her tether
    • Throw kitchen scraps to the chickens, collect eggs
    • Cost: nothing
  • Day six
    • Cleanup day. Pick up the trash the goat has uncovered.  Pile bricks and cinder blocks.
    • Burn what should be burned
    • Sort trash and take things to the recycling center.
    • Hit some garage sales and buy second-hand tools
    • Milk the goat and move her tether
    • Chickens/ scraps/ eggs
    • Cost: recycling money minus garage sale purchases
  • Day seven
    • Rest
    • Have someone over for breakfast. Feed him or her fresh eggs and goats’ milk.
    • Take note of, and give thanks for, all the beauty that is already emerging from the land you have taken pity on, and are in the process of serving.
    • Give thanks for the way it is already serving you back
    • Milk the goat and move her tether
    • Chickens/ scraps/ eggs
    • Profit: look around you and see that you are already a farmer

Doesn’t it sound beautiful?  and possible?

3 thoughts on “become a farmer in seven days

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